mama4x

2012-07-11T21:19:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my creative space!

This site is an introduction to everything I do. Take a look around, and please tell people about these resources!

Higher Education: A blog investigating Classical Education in general, and our homeschool lifestyle in particular. Check out what we're studying and how we spend our time. Peek into the house of a homeschool family that doesn't dress the boys in matching khakis and the girls in long denim dresses, yet doesn't spend their days counting flower petals in a field somewhere either.

Classical Curriculum: a website designed to help homeschool families choose the best curriculum for their needs. Organized so you can search by grade or by subject, it highlights what I think is the best way to classically educate your child! These curriculum choices are based on the classical education plan laid out by Susan Wise Bauer in her book, The Well-Trained Mind.

This site is going to be continually updated as I post more reviews. Thanks for your patience!

New Mercy: A blog detailing the journey I am on with the God of the universe, where I try to build monuments to what He's teaching me. I try to consistently do His will, and learn to shed my selfish habits. Life is crummy sometimes, and I couldn't get through it without His sustaining, unfailing love. This blog has a special focus on women who feel alone in their marriage, or who are enduring a separation from their husband, but want to glorify God through the good times and the bad.

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If you buy a book from Amazon after linking through my sites, I get 4%. So thanks!

2012-07-10T07:32:00.000-07:00

Read my entire profile here.

Mama4x is on a blog host, but I've set it up like a website. If you click on "older posts" you'll be brought into a land of unorganized and uncharted territory which I can't recommend. So... don't go off wandering! Thanks for visiting!

2012-07-09T19:06:00.000-07:00

Me in the NY Times!

2012-07-08T07:22:00.000-07:00

Eeeek! I was mentioned in an article on the front page of the NY TIMES! (ok, it was the front page of the Arts section) Here's the quote:

"Another [group] heard Teresa Dear, a former Russian linguist in the Air Force and a mother of four, lay out plans for a piece of Christian devotional literature, aimed at helping women who are going through marital problems.

In a separate room Ms. Dear’s husband James, another former Air Force linguist who served with the NSA, was scratching on a pad and trying to figure out what exactly it was that he wanted to say. (Ms. Dear’s father, Vince Giammalvo, a Vietnam veteran who served in the Army for 23 years, was in yet another of the writers’ rooms.)

“I’ve got 150 things, all over the place,” Mr. Dear said. His current job as a landscape designer keeps him busy, he added. “But there’s something in my heart,” he said, speaking after a session with Mr. Kelly and the television writer Chris Brancato. “I feel like it’s a calling to write.”"

10/13/09- entire article, written by Michael Cieply, here.

Timeline Ridiculousness

2011-12-28T18:53:00.000-08:00

Here's a portrait of our family by Claire, then 9 years old:

(L-R) Dad, Jackson, Mom, Nathan, Claire, Lily, Eli, Stella, Koda

(Eli, Stella, and Koda are dogs!)

This is what we really look like:

(L-R) Claire, Tracy, Lily, James, Nathan, Jackson

taken 11/2010

TIMELINE OF DEAR FAMILY

November 1995: James and Tracy meet in Austin, TX when they were 16 and 17.
September 1997: spend 6 weeks living in Arteaga, Mexico

July 1998: They got married in Austin Texas and honeymooned 3 weeks in Costa Rica

January 1999: month-long road trip TX-CT-FL-TX

February 1999: joined the Air Force as Russian Linguists

March 1999: stationed at DLI FLC, Fort Ord, Monterey, CA

June 1999: we get our Boxer mix, Eli

June 2000: stationed in San Angelo, TX

February 2001: stationed at Fort Meade, Maryland

July 20001: Claire was born in Annapolis, MD

May 2003: Jackson was born in Arnold, MD

January 2005: get out of Air Force and move to Seguin, Texas

November 2005: Lily born in Round Rock, Texas

January 2006: move to Round Rock, Texas
September 2006: begin homeschooling

August 2007: James and Tracy end 18-month separation

December 2007: Nathan born in Round Rock, Texas

July 2008: 10 year anniversary!

March 2009: Tracy started blogging

February 2010: got chickens and started a vegetable garden

September 2010: House flooded in Tropical Storm Hermine

On our way to Louisiana for Thanksgiving 2010

Tropical Storm Hermine

2011-02-07T20:44:00.000-08:00

The story of the flooding of my house in early September 2010.

The day before the flood, I had taken my kids to their homeschool co-op. The girls were in their Keepers club, my little girl on one side of the portable and my big girl on the other side. My son was across the slippery wet decking at chess club. The cold rain fell steadily and reminded us that September is one short step from winter.

I ran from portable to portable checking on each group's activities. Sliding on the heel of my ever-present flip flops, I flailed my arms to regain my balance, embarrassed although I was the only one outside. The clubs came to an end, but my big-hearted daughter had found a quartet of kittens. Trapped under the deck I had slid on, they cried persistently and peered damply at us through the slimy lattice work that skirted the deck.

One by one the other families left and still we searched for a way to reach them, to pry off the wood or crawl under the deck from another angle. The building was locked and empty, everyone trying to beat the traffic home on another cold and rainy day. I hardened my heart to their predicament and assured my daughter that we did everything we could. The deck was built on high ground and the incessant rain wouldn't flood their hiding place. The mother was hiding from us and would surely come out when we left. When we finally got home my feet were wrinkled and waterlogged as though I had spent the afternoon in a bubblebath.

It continued to rain all day. The creek behind our house was full again, and the chickens were miserable. We put a tarp over their coop and went to bed. At 11:30, my husband and I put on our rainjackets and grabbed the flashlight and went in the back to see how the creek looked. So what, it was still full. Racing by, but not overflowing the banks or anything. We headed to bed.

At 1 a.m. we jumped up because someone knocked on our door. There was no one there, so my husband "checked the perimeter," peeking out the windows and checking the locks. We went back to bed. I got up briefly at 1:30 a.m. because I thought the sprinklers had gone on. At 1:30 my two year old came into our bed with us. And at 1:45 our computer speaker started making a popping noise and James got out of bed -and his feet landed in about 3 inches of water. Soon it had doubled. We moved the four kids (ages 9, 7, 4, 2) and two of the dogs (the old dog sat on his chair the entire ordeal, barely noticing as we raced back and forth) to our bed. I put the kids' scrapbooks up to higher shelves and the water started receding after 3 a.m. Then, my dad arrived from across town and we went with him to his house, where we are still staying.

Our house is one story and inside, the water got to about 6-7 inches. In the backyard, it was a raging, 5-6 foot deep river and in the front it was about a foot deep but really fast. When we looked across the street at our neighbor's dry yard and house, we wondered if we'd have to carry the kids over there if the water continued to rise. In the backyard, our 12 X 20 shed moved 60 feet, plowing over the chicken coop and smashing it against some trees. Then it landed on top of the disc-golf goal and stopped. Thankfully, the doors didn't open and it wasn't washed clean.

We went back "home" Wednesday morning to survey the damage. The force of water is so impressive! We didn't recognize the backyard. As we approached the shed, we saw the disc golf goal peeking out from underneath like the Wicked Witch of the East, but not before we found an intact egg. Six of our 8 chickens survived, looking more miserable and waterlogged than we had last seen them (envision those wet cat pictures on the internet).

We have been overwhelmed by the situation and the action of our church family and homeschool group. I made one call Wednesday morning at about 8:30 and had a steady outpouring of help and love all day. I think about 35 people personally helped us from the body of Christ. Our Real Life group (a new group that met for the first time last Wednesday) came by and served us as we met for the first time. Our homeschool group has been amazing. All our bedding, curtains and the clothes have been taken and washed. Then, so many people took all our books, framed art, scrapbooks, pictures and files to a friend's empty apartment (up 17 steps two times!) to be kept dry from the humidity. We have a lot of books and only lost a few shelves' worth. A man we didn't know, yet, Scott, vacuumed silty water from our house for about 6 hours. Another friend ran the show like a capable general all day because I was sort of useless and slow. Friday, Steve and 17- year old Tyler took all the heavy, wet carpet and padding out of the house. Saturday, men from the church came over and emptied my husband's shed and city workers and volunteers cleared debris and stripped the siding off the shed.

I can't explain really well the feeling you get when you see building debris, ruined furniture, and trash in your friend's and neighbor's front yards. To see front-end loaders dumping it in construction dumpsters parked beside familiar cars. To see police, firemen, church volunteers, disaster specialists, and neighbors asking how they can help and what they can do. Little kids pulling wagons loaded with cold water and sandwiches.

As the house has been manhandled in the name of drying it and preventing mold, we have been figuring out what our plan is for the next few weeks...

Part Two- caution, some foul language. This was written for my writing class and is a little more "artsy" that I usually write. I titled it "Rat Feet."

Two days after the flood brought seven inches of water into our single-story home, the remediation team tramped through the home with the cruel familiarity of a rapist. They ate food from our pantry and put gum on the walls. They cut out the drywall in every room of the house up to about 18 inches. I stood in the garage peered through the entire width of the house, and recognized the muddy legs of my son's bedroom furniture, four rooms away. This furniture, a honey-colored wood, came in a seven piece set in 1950 when my father in law was born. The dark stain of the water had soaked the wood to a dark ashy color.

Pink flakes of insulation melted like cotton candy in small puddles of water that were left in deviations in the slab. My leather couches displayed symmetrical water stains reaching up the backs and sides. The house was a curious disaster. Missing from the mess was every piece of fabric- curtains, bedding, laundry, rugs. They were spread across three counties being laundered by friends and strangers. Also missing was every piece of paper- framed art, scrapbooks, textbooks, files and 23 boxes of regular books. These had spontaneously been placed in foster care at a stranger's empty apartment. Later I learned that these were carried up two flights of 17 steps each. Our remaining belongings huddled like refugees in strange piles and groups. A fine layer of sheetrock dust covered everything in complete disregard of the value, either monetary or personal.

Within a few weeks, the rats found us. They came in through the open walls and luxuriated in the construction site that had our prior home had become. They feasted on brownie mix and brown sugar, tasted the cornstarch and sampled the croutons. When I threw out the lightly packaged products in disgust, they knawed frantically through plastic applesauce jars and cardboard soymilk containers, lapping it up at leisure.

They threw lavish parties using popcorn kernels as confetti and laughed together as they skirted the glue traps. They warned one another of the snapping traps and tiptoed on the canned goods. The rat mothers chatted as their rat offspring played on the wine rack like an upscale playscape.

I opened the attic access to let down the thin folded staircase, a rain of maggots, white and curling, fell to the floor. I felt no remorse, but just a triumphant mix of disgust and victory when I realized that caught in the hinge of the stairs was the prize of a dessicated rat corpse. Its nasty rat teeth stretched out from nasty dried rat lips. Was it's nasty hairless rat tail short, or shorn off by nasty rat enemies, hungry for protein? I could care less.

We returned to the house every few days to remove more of our belongings and see the progress as it was repaired. My children walked through the garage on their way to comb the back yard for sunken treasure. They passed deadly boxes of rat poison, pouring from cereal-sized boxes like so much turquoise granola. I pulled a bin from the garage that my pantry had been emptied into. Chewed-open bags of flour and spilled cooking oil were dyed by food coloring into a bright pink sludge peppered with rat shit. The bin of doll clothes had evidently been home to quite a few rats who didn't mind sleeping in their own feces, tiny pink and blue clothes glued with sticky rat piss to tiny pacifiers and bottles.

Canned goods, thought to be safe from marauding armies, had to be sanitized one by one. A rag was plunged into scalding hot water, soapy and smelling of bleach, and intimately scoured each crevice and groove of the can. It was rinsed in clean hot water and then soaked up more sanitizing liquid for the next can, for each can that survived the onslought of hungry troops. And each spice jar. And each appliance, bin, lid, bottle, and container. Scald, rinse, boil, wipe, dip, scour, rub, clean. A fine layer of sheetrock dust covered each item. Greasy rat footprints scampered through all the dust, leaving evidence of each frolic. My hands became red and scaly, dry and chapped as I worked through every item I owned. Loading the dishwasher, unloading it. Filling the washing machine with hot water and setting the dials for a double rinse. Clacking the emptied bins against the sidewalk so that the dunes of rat shit spill out. Wiping, wiping, wiping.

2010-12-14T13:48:00.000-08:00

Preppers know the general state of their friends and neighbor's pantries- bare at the end of the month, if you don't count the stray jars of salad dressing, half-bags of bowtie pasta, and the occasional can of baby corn they didn't put into that stir-fry. "Getting extra" means planning on more chips when friends come over to watch the game.

I created this article as the one-chance, first- or last-ditch attempt to teach someone about the basics of prepping. For many of us, we stand alone in the prepping arena, and are desperate to share our knowledge with others without seeming nuts or outrageous. This article is my attempt to do so- count yourself blessed, because whoever gave this to you cares for you.

PRINCIPLES AND PROCEDURES OF PREPPING

The news today is full of reports ranging from a basic weather report all the way to an obscure article shrieking about certain annihilation from nuclear blast. How does a busy person react to all the media we receive each day? You must filter it through your situation and determine the likelihood of such events effecting you and your family.

Do earthquakes occur frequently in your area, or are you more prone to blizzards that knock down the power lines? Do you live in an arid region likely to have drought, or do you live on the coast where hurricane season comes every year? Preparing your family to "weather" such normal situations begins with knowing what the threats are.

Then you need to consider the more economic or social scenarios that could effect your family. Are you in a racially diverse city where a certain verdict could lead to riots? Do you think the dollar is gaining strength, or are you concerned that our nation may experience hyperinflation or even collapse? Do you remember 9/11 and wonder if something similar -or worse- could happen again? Your responses to these questions will help you plan how to protect your family from such events.

Some preppers focus on techie gear- night vision goggles and such. Other preppers want to farm in seclusion. Some preppers rely on gunpower to feel secure. And most of us fall in the middle of the spectrum as money allows. Of course, you always have the more extreme zombie sites, 1800's lifestyle sites, and the Mad Max/ TEOTWAWKI sites. Readers have to discern which style suits your family, your situation, your budget, and your outlook. I focus on scenarios that are high-likelihood and high-impact for my family.

THE RULE OF 3

The prepping principle we refer to when deciding how to prepare for a given situation is called the "rule of 3." It reminds us that in extreme circumstances, we can only:

go 3 minutes without air
go 3 hours without shelter
go 3 days without water
go 3 weeks without food

Our preparations, be they for a dead car battery, or all the way up to a Katrina-style interruption of our lives, must reflect the rule of 3. How so?

1. AIR: we should have means to protect our nose and mouth, such as a N95 mask. You may think there is no need for this, like I did until recently, when I read reports of a train car spill of chlorine which caused an immediate evacuation of a residential neighborhood because of fumes.

2. SHELTER: this is usually covered by our homes, but to be fully prepared, you need to think of where you would go if you had to leave your home. Don't become a refugee! (it does apply to you: think Superdome) Whose house will you go to if your home is flooded? If forest fires threaten your street? What if that person has also been evacuated?

3. WATER: one of the most crucially important features yet easily overlooked in our "turn the faucet" lives. If you have ever had to turn the water off for a few hours for a home repair, or been camping where you must haul in your water, you know how much we take it for granted. The first step towards water preparations would be to refill any sturdy containers with tap water instead of throwing them out. Soda bottles and Gatorade bottles are good for this. When you get more serious about your family's safety, do a search on your local Craigslist for the phrase "rainwater collection" or "barrels/ buckets." For about $10 you can get a 15-gallon receptacle; for $30 a 55-gallon barrel; for $80 a 275-gallon reservoir. Put them in each closet, in the garage, or under the deck, depending on size, and you are well on your way. Remember, WHO, FEMA, and other disaster organizations recommend one gallon per person for food preparation and drinking water. The extreme importance of water cannot be understated.

4. FOOD: Food is one preparation that you can do all the time. Pick up more canned goods when you go grocery shopping. Get a dehydrator and dry fruits and vegetables. One of the best places to build up a supply of staples is the Food Storage Store through the Mormon, or LDS, church. Their prices are extremely low and they have stores all over the country. They sell staple foods such as pasta, rice, wheat, sugar, and beans in 25# bags. A prepping tangent related to food is food storage. It's pretty simple; food stored for an unknown disaster must be stored properly. Food deteriorates when in contact with light, warmth, and/ or moisture. A barrier that isn't broken by these food storage culprits is called Mylar- the same, but thicker, as the party balloons. Many preppers use white plastic buckets found for free at local bakeries or restaurants to protect and store the food.

REDUNDANT SYSTEMS

Another important principle of prepping is having redundant systems. It means that if you only have one water bottle, and it gets shattered, then you have none. If you have 2, though, and one leaks, then you still have one. So, now you'll understand when you see the phrase "One is none, two is one, three is two." Here's what redundancy means in the areas covered by the Rule of 3:

1. AIR: We discussed the simple protection of an N95 mask, and you can create a redundant system by having separated supplies of masks, or upgrading to a contaminant suit with sophisticated gas mask. They are actually not too expensive, and if you live near a nuclear facility or have a family member with a comprimised immune system, they might be for you.

2. SHELTER: Generally your own home. Many preppers, especially those in cities, create a redundant system by have what is called a "bug-out plan" where they go to another location. It may be a like-minded friend, or your own rural property. Do you have, or know how to pitch a simple tent? Under all circumstances do not allow your family to become wandering refugees, or submit to the experience of being in government containment.

3. WATER: We discussed the first system of water storage above. To create a backup plan for this crucial resource, you need to look at local water sources and purchase a Berkey water filter. There are good plans online for making your own system using a Berkey, two 5-gallon buckets, and a spigot. A simple strong plastic tarp can be used during a rainstorm to collect water to refill your receptacles. An inexpensive package of pool shock stores well and can purify water.

4. FOOD: To create redundant systems in food storage means to break up your properly stored foods around your house, property, and family. In addition, it means storing, planting, and harvesting non GMO seeds from your own garden. Learning to can what you grow is an excellent backup to grocery store canned food. Sprouting seeds is an excellent option to fresh vegetables, but you must have a huge amount stored to do it indefinitely. Having the means and knowledge to hunt, snare or raise your own meat is another way to duplicate a food source.

FINAL THOUGHTS

As you become more confident about why to prep, and it becomes second nature to make preparations, you will begin to branch out into other areas of preparation, which are beyond the scope of this article's goal. To whet your appetite, they include:

security/ safety
mindset/ emotional
medical/ first aid
silver/ barter /skills

I am a stay-at-home mama who just learned about prepping in February. I used to feel panicky when I read about inflation, food storage, and all the facets of preparing for any scenario. I thought that surely the "SHTF" was going to happen any day and my family and I would just be out of luck. Now I understand the necessity of working towards goals as each day allows, prioritizing, and not acting out of fear, but from a position of information. I hope that this article is something that your unprepared friends and family can learn from. If you'd like to learn more about anything I've described, check out the following links.

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We had a prepper mindset for a long time before we actually took any action. These are the things that knocked us off our happy little place straddling on the fence. Get Off The Fence!

I read this "One-Hour Meltdown" Yikes!

I read this blog for about 2 hours: Survival Mom

I read news articles about the water shortage in CA, and the nationwide food shortage it can lead to. In addition this happened in MA and was an example to all about the fragility of potable city water. Learn about the on-demand restocking that is normal in all our stores. Most stores get completely restocked every 3 days, with no inventory on-hand. What if that supply chain gets disrupted?

I blog-hopped prepper blogs for a few days, following their links.

Should you move to the middle of nowhere? I think no, unless you live in/near these cities, but you have to decide for yourself.

"but what if nothing happens?"

This short video had a lot to do with knocking me rudely out of ignorance:

Go to the National Inflation Association and get on their email list. Share their videos. Here are two. If you only have time for one, watch the first one. Here is an article that concurs, but focuses on Russia.

Here are some links to some great preparation blogs. Follow their links and bookmark good stuff.

Why are you prepping? Read Survival Mom's Who's Who.

Excellent start at building your pantry on $10 a week.

Preparedness Pro is an excellent, rational, panic-free authority.

Rawles' Lists for Survival Newbies

**Read about historical hyperinflation in Germany and Zimbabwe.

**Argentina has gone through what many suspect will happen here. Learn from example.

Learn about ham radio! It's not a dying hobby... link.

The best all-inclusive, 12-topic plan-starter I've seen: HERE (start at the bottom and work up)

Coming soon to a planet near you... Solar EMP: learn here and here.

Caution: don't fall too far on either side of the prepper spectrum.

Be "prepared, not panicked"

Read their answers. Watch their videos. Learn at National Inflation Association.

Find a local LDS (Mormon) Food Storage Store: excellent prices, no shipping, don't have to attend their church. There are more than are listed so call!

Eulogy for Eli

2010-10-04T21:47:00.000-07:00

We put our dog, Eli, down on Saturday, October 2, 2010. He was a Boxer-Rhodesian Ridgeback mix, and was at least 14 years old. It was so hard. We waited with him at the vet's, and despite the tumors and his bowels and the near-blindness and the hoarse bark and the skinniness and the hearing loss, he was still himself. He was so excited to get on the leash and go with us. He was so trusting and explored the office like he always did. It was so hard! As they inserted the needle, and I petted his face, and talked to him, I wanted to yell "No! Don't do it! We'll figure something out!" It was so fast and he was just gone.

Eli was with us through so much. Countless moves (was it only 7?), 4 kids, a separation, his surgery, 2 other dogs joining our family... We just couldn't bear to put him down because we loved him so much and just put up with all his physical deterioration. (Good thing we had the hard flooring!) As I remembered him I was brought back to all the times and places we've been.

In California, we were carefree and enjoying life, the Air Force training we received, the gorgeous location... we decided to get a Boxer because James had one when he was young. We contacted a Boxer rescue and told them we'd like a small female Boxer. We drove over an hour north to meet one they thought would be a good match. We walked around the side of the foster house towards a 4-foot tall fence. Intermittently a brown dog's head would bound up over the fence. We came up to the fence and there was a huge dog, jumping vertically, like Tigger. What?! A Boxer mix- a Rhodesian Ridgeback, no less- a dog bred to hunt lions- a MALE, and with huge teeth. He was 2 or 3 years old, his ears were asymmetrical and his tail was docked. His previous owner had gone to jail. He had a few nicks on his face, bald spots in the shape of a cut, as if he had fought with other dogs.

Well, he was a bundle of love, and we piled him into our tiny pathetic Toyota Corrola. The back seat had 2 seatbelts, and was anchored to the floorboards only in the middle, so each side bowed into the outer wall. If Eli moved out of the middle of the backseat, he was sort of thrown to the floor. I was bribing him with Wendy's french fries and James was chanting "Good boy, Eli, Good dog, Eli, Eli, Eli, Eli!" so that he would learn that he was no longer "Max." When I ran out of french fries I remember looking back into the back seat, at that huge animal with those big teeth and that bright pink, lolling tongue, and thinking, "what have we done?!"

What an adventure it was, getting to know Eli and what it was like to have a big dog in the house. The first night we put him in his new kennel and he cried so convincingly that we opened the bedroom door for him- he bounded up on the bed instantly, and never again was in a kennel. The first day we left him in the kitchen because we didn't know how he'd treat the house. It was like waiting for Christmas all day, to go home and see him. He heard us coming and was waiting for us... we decided to see how he'd do for an hour or so while we went to PT (physical training in the AF). We came back to a perfect house and a dog sleeping curled up on the couch- he lifted his head, "where'ya been?" We had bought some couches from a couple that smoked in the home. I kept Febrezing them, but for about a week we joked that Eli was home all day smoking while we were at language school.

His energy and life- he'd leap over the chain link fence in an effortless bound and go after some critter. He and I were on a walk once and I wasn't paying attention, and he jerked the leash right out of my hand, pulling me - literally- right out of my slippers. He lounged with me on the hammock in our living room, and took over our king-size bed during the course of a night. We sent him to doggie boot camp and the trainer said his back was as wide as an aircraft carrier, and that he would have to lose some weight. We used to take him to the abandoned part of Fort Ord, CA and go to the old tennis courts and play frisbee with him off-leash.

Once we had some people over for dinner- James grilled some steaks to perfection. They were served up on the plates and we were talking. To our horror, Eli had stuck his head up between one of our friends' arms and the table, and while maintaining perfect eye contact with James, he licked the side of our friend's steak at least twice before we reacted.

He loved my father-in-law and knew that with him, he was welcome as a lap dog, slowly working his way under Jack's arm and up into his lap. He had a trot line when Jackson was a baby, on a short backyard in military housing. He would hi-step it through the snow and hurry back to our leather couch as quickly as he could. His entire body would tremble with anticipation when he would watch the squirrels playing on "his" deck. He was mournful without us once when we boarded him for a week in Texas. He loved squeak toys and ignored the Kong, unless it was filled with peanut butter, after which he'd make out with it for an hour. He did briefly have an over-appreciation for men's shoes- that were still on their feet. He'd open his big mouth over their foot and just hover there, above their foot, moving as they tried to walk. It was really annoying!

Once, when I was pregnant with Claire, he got out of the time-share at the beach and was running around exploring the parking lot. I was hormonal and frantic. I was terrified he was going to get hit by a car. He was like my first child! A car slowed to look at us as we stupidly chased him. They rolled down their window at James' frantic gesturing. "Open the door!" he yelled, hoping Eli would try to hop in and we could corner him in the doorway. "Yeah, right!" was the response. I looked at Eli with new eyes- I knew who he was, but to these strangers he was just a big hulking dog. When I introduced people to Eli, I warned them that he would soon be asleep on the couch. I just didn't think of him as a threatening looking dog. He sat in front of me, strangely protective, before I knew I was in labor with Claire. (here he is, with Claire as an infant, 2001)

(here he is meeting Jackson for the first time, 2003)

When we moved back to Texas in 2005 he was a tad older, but we only noticed it when we looked back. He spent more time on the couch, but would run a path in the grass next to the fence where he would growl at the neighbor's Doberman. When James and I were separated, I worried about Eli until he finally came up to Round Rock. He lived in our downstairs living/dining room, and welcomed me when I came down each morning. I would listen for the clink of his tags on his black leather collar as he raised his head to see me, and then we'd have a quick morning walk before the day started. In January of 2007 he had his first serious tumor removed in a surgery. They told us that based on his bloodwork, his liver could begin to fail, and that a sign of it would be when he began to drink huge amounts of water.

We got our dog Stella in the fall of 2007. She took years off Eli's age as they formed a friendship and wrestled and played. He was frolicking and pouncing again, and we realized how quiet he had become. He welcomed our fourth baby into the house, but he wasn't as patient with our last two kids as he was with our first two. If anyone leaned on his hips, or messed with his legs, he would jump off the couch or give a warning noise. He never bit or nipped anyone, except once James' hand (long ago) when they were wrestling- and he knew it right away, and rolled over onto his back for James.

He started to have allergies again, something he hadn't struggled with for years. We put him back on his old diet- carrots, broccoli & kale (chopped up in the food processor) with cottage cheese and yogurt mixed in, and eggs on top. See how much we loved him? Every 9 days or so I'd make his dinner, and we kept it in a big bin in the fridge. If he had any other food (besides a carb) he'd puke on the floor within minutes. Then he had to start eating his meals outside, or else he'd "have an accident" on the floor as soon -literally- as he finished eating. See how much we loved him?

He began to steal food off the counters, out of the kids' hands, out of the pantry even. Whole loaves of bread. Once he ate about 2 pounds of carrots, 3 nectarines, and an apple off the counter.What a weirdo.

He began drinking and drinking and drinking. He couldn't keep weight on. He couldn't hear us very well, and he stopped catching the food we'd toss at him, because he couldn't see it as well. But he wagged his tail, and got up to go pee each day, and barked at the window and ran to the door. He would still bark to come in when he was done outside- nothing but an indoor dog, this one! He never cried or seemed uncomfortable, and aside from some random backwards kicks during the day, his legs seemed ok. However, when I got Stella's vaccinations I didn't get Eli's. I knew he was going to have to go down soon, but I couldn't bear it if he didn't seem uncomfortable. But I knew it was really coming when I didn't get his rabies shot this year.

When our house flooded, and James and I were sloshing back and forth, Eli laid curled up on the armchair the entire time. He would look up at us periodically as if to ask why we were interrupting an old man's sleep. We brought him to my parent's house the next day, but had to keep him outside. He barked himself hoarse all through the night. We found a foster home for him where he stayed for over 2 weeks. However, she was undergoing radiation for breast cancer and it was too much to ask for her to take care of such an old man too. Another friend did it for a week, but we had to take him back. We had barely seen him in a month. He had worn his upper lip raw, no fur at all, just a bright pink mustache. His voice was still coarse and he was noticeably skinnier, although our friend had been over-feeding him. I couldn't imagine having one of them calling us, saying he had died the night before. What must he think of us, abandoning him like this after so long together?

We knew the time was coming. We didn't know where we were going to be living, where to bury him. I couldn't bear for them to stuff him in a trash bag, freeze him, and stick him in a landfill. We brought him upstairs to sleep with us, since he was so miserable on the patio in the kennel. He was up and down all night, wandering, sniffing around. We made an appointment, and canceled it. We talked about his fate as we walked with him the 6 acres of my parent's property. He nearly fell in the pond, and tripped on the stones out in nature.

We made another appointment. Finally, James made himself dig a hole in the field near the pond. It was extremely hard, breaking up the stones with a pick. I dropped the kids off at a friend's and used her sewing machine to sew Eli's shroud. I used the top sheet from an old set of my father-in-law's sheets. It was time. All morning Eli had been walking around off-leash, following James around the yard. How often and how long we had wanted him to do that!

He was and always be our Eli. An era in our family is over.

1996-2010

Our Flood

2010-09-15T15:05:00.000-07:00

Tropical Storm Hermine: the story of the flooding of my house last week.

Tuesday morning it was already raining when we woke up... and it continued to rain all day, all night, and into the next day. The creek behind our house was full again, and the chickens were miserable. We put a tarp over their coop and went to bed. At 11:30, my husband and I put on our rainjackets and grabbed the flashlight and went in the back to see how the creek looked. So, it was still full. Racing by, but not overflowing the banks or anything. We headed to bed.

At 1 a.m. we jumped up because someone knocked on our door! There was no one there, so my husband "checked the perimeter," peeking out the windows and checking the locks. We went back to bed. I got up briefly at 1:30 a.m. because I thought the sprinklers had gone on. At 1:45 our computer speaker started making a popping noise and James got out of bed and his feet landed in about 3 inches of water. Soon it had doubled. We moved the four kids (ages 9, 7, 4, 2) and two of the dogs (the old dog sat on his chair the entire ordeal, barely noticing as we raced back and forth) to our bed. I put the kids scrapbooks up to higher shelves, and then moved paper-wrapped bags of wheat and rice to the top of the piano and kitchen table until the water started receding after 3 a.m. Then, my dad arrived from across town and we went with him to his house, where we are still staying.

Our house is one story and inside, the water got to about 6-7 inches. In the backyard, it was a raging, 5-6 foot deep river and in the front it was about a foot deep but really fast. When we looked across the street at our neighbor's dry yard and house, we wondered if we'd have to carry the kids over there if the water continued to rise. In the backyard, our 12 X 20 shed moved 60 feet, plowing over the chicken coop and smashing it against some trees. Then it landed on top of the disc-gold goal and stopped. Thankfully, the doors didn't open and it wasn't washed clean.

We went back "home" Wednesday morning to survey the damage. The force of water is so impressive! We didn't recognize the backyard. As we approached the shed, we saw the disc golf goal peeking out from underneath like the Wicked Witch of the East, but not before we found an intact egg. Six of our 8 chickens survived, looking more miserable and waterlogged than we had last seen them (envision those wet cat pictures on the internet).

We have been overwhelmed by the situation and the action of our church family and homeschool group. I made one call Wednesday morning at about 8:30 and had a steady outpouring of help and love all day. I think about 35 people personally helped us from the body of Christ. Our Real Life group (a new group that met for the first time last Wednesday) came by and served us as we met for the first time. Our homeschool group has been amazing. All our bedding, curtains and the clothes have been taken and washed. Then, so many people took all our books, framed art, scrapbooks, pictures and files to a friend's empty apartment (up 17 steps two times!) to be kept dry from the humidity. We have a lot of books and only lost a few shelves' worth. A man we didn't know, yet, Scott, vacuumed silty water from our house for about 6 hours. Another friend ran the show like a capable general all day because I was sort of useless and slow. Friday, Steve and 17- year old Tyler took all the heavy, wet carpet and padding out of the house. Saturday, men from the church came over and emptied my husband's shed and city workers and volunteers cleared debris and stripped the siding off the shed.

I can't explain really well the feeling you get when you see building debris, ruined furniture, and trash in your friend's and neighbor's front yards. To see front-end loaders dumping it in construction dumpsters parked beside familiar cars. To see police, firemen, church volunteers, disaster specialists, and neighbors asking how they can help and what they can do. Little kids pulling wagons loaded with cold water and sandwiches.

Michelle, Angie, Leslie, Shalanda, Kevin, BJ, Niesha, Nina, Carla, Karen, Jeff, Tina, Jessica, Christine, Christina, Sommer, Barie, Laura, Mike, Kevin, Chris, Blake- new friends I can't remember their names and all the kids who pitched in- its so many to thank. Just their presence, their words, their box of trash bags- they are so appreciated. It's not that it was a big or small task, but that they took the effort to do it for us. As the house has been manhandled in the name of drying it and preventing mold, we have been figuring out what our plan is for the next few weeks... more later.

Favorite Books Ever

2010-01-12T17:53:00.000-08:00

Amazon.com Widgets

A Prayer

2010-01-02T09:04:00.000-08:00

People to Keep in our Prayers

President Barack Obama

Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid

and the people in government to value their position

and realize the country is not for them to shape but

that it should reflect those in it

The unborn and their mothers,

for the community to help her and support her

so that she can realistically choose life

For those caught up in modern-day slavery,

for the trafficked who seem invisible

For young men to seek out strong role models

to emulate healthy adults and protect the weak

For the married to stick with each other

not only when it is fun but through

sickness, poverty and difficulty too

For the children around the country and the world

who are vulnerable and in need

for their protection and their innocence

That the indecent and offenders will find

real and lasting life change through Christ

That the professing Christians will be bold and

genuine and admit that they are sinners

who follow a generous God

For fathers to lead and tend to

their families, to realize that families

are shaped by neglect as well as love

For mothers to value their children

and their role as nuturer and leader

of the next generation

For the local church to step out

and not only witness to the lost

but also minister to the ones in their own pews

from the keyboard of mama4x

My Creative Family

2010-01-01T12:50:00.000-08:00

My daughter, Claire, has a blog called
CLAIRE'S FANTASTICA.

My son, Jackson, has a creation diary called
LEGO MANIAC.

My dad has written a collection of stories
about his time in VietNam at
TOUR OF DUTY.

Books that Changed my Life

2010-01-01T12:44:00.000-08:00

MARRIAGE:

PARENTING:

RAISING DAUGHTERS:

RAISING SONS:

Songs that Helped Me

2009-10-30T20:00:00.000-07:00

mama4x "studio" tour

2009-10-26T14:16:00.000-07:00

Hey there! It's flattering to me that you'd be interested in where I work and the 'magic behind the product' so, here you go! That's why you're buying handmade, right?

Here is a picture of me in my "studio," better known as my kitchen table. I usually put my kids to bed or ship them across town to my mom's and then spread out all my paper-crafting supplies on the table. I usually have a card or two in mind that I make a big (12-20 cards) batch of. Sometimes, though, if I have a new stamp set or a new punch, or some gorgeous stickers I picked up on sale, I'll just mess around and see what looks good. (These 'mess-around' cards usually end up as my templates for batch sessions later.) I usually stand when I stamp. I cut all the paper to the card size and then stamp all the images, then cut out all the accents and last of all, arrange it in a way I like and glue it down.

Here's another picture of me at the computer desk, posting cards on my Etsy page. (go buy one now! I'll be here when you get back!)

This is the cabinet I store all of my supplies in. (It's in the guest bathroom closet) You can see my yarns and fibers on the top shelf. My seasonal stamps sets are up there, and so is my heat-embossing gun and all the embossing powders in a box. The middle shelf has my paper supply and all of my inkpads. On the bottom shelf is the stamp sets. Most of my stamps are made by Stampin' Up but can you see the white notebook down there? It is full of repositionable stamps that temporarily adhere to an acrylic block.

Well, eventually the kids come home and I'd better pack it all up. Thanks for spending some time with me here! I look forward to any convos you may write. Feel free to contact me with any special requests or color adjustments to a card you -almost- love.

Click on the headline mama4x at the top to go to the homepage! See everything I'm up to.

Choose Life

2009-08-31T14:15:00.000-07:00

In the Womb: 3-D video by Nat'l Geographic

Dad's Point-of-View Music Video

Testimony of Jill Stanek: Live Birth Abortion

"... called induced labor abortion, now also known as "live birth abortion." In this particular abortion procedure doctors do not attempt to kill the baby in the uterus. The goal is simply to prematurely deliver a baby who dies during the birth process or soon afterward. It is not uncommon for a live aborted baby to linger for an hour or two or even longer." read entire testimony. (*Notification: the site that hosts this testimony also carries graphic, heart-breaking photos of aborted babies, in the hopes that if people see what actually happens, they will become actively involved in caring for the women who do this and changing laws and attitudes.*)

Click here to go to the NRL homepage...

become educated, sign up for political action alerts, donate...

What can you do? You're busy, but your heart hurts for the unborn, and the women who carry them, caught in a hard decision? Look around you. There are prayer teams covering abortion clinics near you. There are crisis pregnancy centers that need volunteers. There are girls in your area that need prayer. There are kids in foster care, whose mothers choose life, but then faltered and struggled, and these kids need homes. What can you do? Donate your time, your money, your parenting knowledge, your home. Drop off a pack of diapers at the crisis pregnancy center! What can you DO to choose life?

You Are What You Eat- So, Ask Questions! Inform Yourself!

2009-07-14T08:53:00.000-07:00

You might think you're eating healthy. You might want to think again. The dangers of these foods range from PCBs in certain fish, to large trace amounts of pesticides on fresh fruit and veggies. This past year, the National Institutes of Health even linked long-term pesticide exposure to diabetes. To avoid these health risks, we came up with a list of ten foods to beware, both for your health and for the health of the environment." Read entire article HERE.

"The entire matter of food and especially that of milk is surrounded with emotional and cultural importance. Milk was our very first food. Now, we are a nation of milk drinkers. Nearly all of us. Infants, the young, adolescents, adults and even the aged. We drink dozens or even several hundred gallons a year and add to that many pounds of "dairy products" such as cheese, butter, and yogurt. Can there be anything wrong with this?"
Read the entire article HERE

MAD COWBOY: Plain Truth from the Cattle Rancher Who Won't Eat Meat
"Lyman describes how he has shifted his thinking 180 degrees from his years as a dairy farmer, cattle rancher, and steak eater to his current focus as a vegan who is president of the International Vegetarian Union. As a cattle rancher and feedlot operator who practiced factory farming, he gained a clear picture of how meat is produced in this country. What he describes are unsavory practices to produce an abundance of meat for the American dining table..."
Read entire book review HERE

Fateful Harvest: The True Story of a Small Town, a Global Industry, and a Toxic Secret
"Any food that we buy today may have been grown on land fertilized by hazardous waste, and may have absorbed toxic heavy metals from the soil, including lead, cadmium, mercury, and arsenic. There is simply no way one can know. But with hundreds of industries "recycling" their industrial waste as fertilizer to save the high cost of storing it in a hazardous waste landfill, it is becoming more and more likely. A legal loophole in the United States allows industrial manufacturing companies to sell their waste to fertilizer companies and to dump millions of tons of hazardous waste directly on the land as fertilizer and soil amendments..." Read entire book review HERE